Stunslinger.com Blog

I’m finished with one job, and I’m getting ready to start my new job in Portland.  Part of this required getting another physical at the VA here.  So I went in Monday afternoon and met with the physician who asked me a bunch of questions.  One of these questions was, “What are you going to be doing in Portland?”  I told him, and then he decided he should tell me that his perception is that every psychology employee he’s seen had mental illnesses themselves.  Ok.  I made some joke about “psychologist heal thyself” and we moved on.

Then he kept asking me about Oregon and telling me about relatives or friends who live in certain cities.  I just wanted to get done with it, so I played along, “Oh yeah, Fairvilletown is a great place to live.”  I did well enough because he finally passed me off to the nurse.

She asked me to sign some forms and said, “Oh, your signature is good enough, you could be a doctor.”  I informed her that I actually am a doctor, of psychology.  I followed it up with, “A fake doctor!” and laughed at my joke.  Apparently my joke wasn’t that funny, because she didn’t seem to hear it.  What she did hear was “psychology.”  I should have remembered at the beginning of our meeting she said, “I had a rough Sunday.”  This should have told me to keep my mouth shut, but I missed it.

I should mention that while this was happening, she was prepping the needle she was going to stick into my arm.  So she began telling me about her rotten ex-daughter-in-law who has a counseling degree and treats her like crap.  Great.  “Could I just have the injection without you getting riled up please?”  For ten minutes she regaled me with her fascinating “Story of the Dying Dog and the Evil Ex-Daughter-In-Law.”  All the while the needle sat ready to go on the table.  Ugh.

Anyway, got through the physical and had my blood drawn at the lab.  As a side note, I had the best phlebotomist ever — I didn’t feel the needle go in, and after drawing three vials of blood it didn’t bleed at all onto the bandage.  I’m now physically cleared to be a psychologist resident.  Basically I have to be able to sit in a chair and talk to people.  I’m a perfect physical specimen.

I wonder if it’s made with real gypsy tears…

First of all, my wife has an ACL!  We are very excited about this, especially since after the last surgery we were so disappointed.

Our day began wonderfully, with a flat tire.  I had to run in to work for a few minutes to make a quick phone call, but was stopped just a few blocks away by a “whump-whump-whump” noise.  Crap.  My driver’s side rear tire was completely flat.  So I got to spend some quality time changing my tire out for the spare.  Finally got to work and made my phone calls.  I did feel sort of odd walking around the VA in a t-shirt, jeans, and flip-flops.  Not exactly a flip-flop crowd.

Anyway, we ended up running all the way out to Heber City, UT, where Mrs. Stunslinger had her surgery.  The hospital was actually quite nice, and I dare say it was a better experience than the one we were at last time, in Salt Lake.  Of course we had to wait much longer than expected, but overall it was a good experience.  The surgeon’s assistant came in and told us everything went well and she should be back to normal in 6 months.  He said there was absolutely no evidence of inflammation and the meniscus repair they did last time looked excellent.  Finally, good news after a surgery!

Despite all this good, I still have found something to complain about!  Last time we went through this ordeal we were given several pieces of equipment.  And when I say given, I mean we paid exorbitant fees for them.  We got a fancy brace that cost several hundred dollars, and a very expensive (and actually quite cool) ice machine that pumps ice water through a tube and into a bladder that is put on her knee.  Anyway, we thought, “It would be ridiculous to pay for these expensive pieces of equipment twice!”  So we brought our own, in an attempt to save a bit of money.

When we told the nurse, she said, “We’ll see if that will connect with ours.”  Apparently they can’t use the same bladder twice, so they had to check and see if our contraption fit with their bladder - and of course it didn’t.  So we had to put our perfectly good ice machine back in the trunk, and buy another one.  Then, when she came back from surgery they informed us that they couldn’t use the expensive brace.  Apparently the brace had straps that were too short, so it wouldn’t fit over the dressing she has right now.  Double sweet.

So, basically we had two perfectly good pieces of equipment that couldn’t be used.  I will say that the new ice machine is much quieter when running, and easier to refill.  But still…

It’s official.  Today we went to the orthopedic surgeon’s office to check out my wife’s knee.  He was happy with what he saw, and even had good news about the possibility of her having rheumatoid arthritis.  Since she hasn’t had any swelling in other joints, he said it’s likely if she does have rheumatoid, it’s a less severe version that affects just a few joints.  We still get to stick with the anti-inflammatory diet, though.

He was happy that most of the swelling has gone away, and cleared her for surgery.  Yay!  Now, we’re planning on moving back to Oregon at the end of the month, which makes things somewhat difficult.  We’ve found an excellent surgeon here, and we want him to perform the surgery, but his schedule isn’t exactly wide open.  Unfortunately the next opening he had was for September 5.  Crap!  But then the receptionist remembered that there was a likely cancellation for this Thursday, but it’s out in Heber City.  Now, we don’t really care about that.  In Utah, it’s a ridiculous distance to travel, but to us it’s no big deal.  So we wiggled my wife out of work this week and pounced on the Thursday time.

So now we’re good to go.  I’m taking time off work and my mom is flying out to help take care of my wife and help me get ready to move.  It’ll be complicated for sure, but in the end we’ll be back in Portland and my wife will have an intact knee!

Good day.

Today my wife called her doctor to ask about some swelling and also asked if the pathology results were back regarding the possibility of her having rheumatoid tissue.  He said it was back and the tissue was not rheumatoid!  Apparently it did show chronic inflammation, which is never good, but we’re very excited she doesn’t have rheumatoid arthritis!

This, in combination with the news of my brother-in-law’s clean bill of health is a great way to start the week!

For those who know me, you’ll know how amazing this is.  For the rest of you, a little background:

Years ago my brother-in-law, we’ll call him Franz, had kidney failure.  He searched around, found a couple of potential donors, and received a kidney transplant.  Then doctors discovered cancer in his sinuses, behind his nose.  So they had to peel his face up, remove the tumors, rebuild his nose and subject him to chemo and radiation.  During the process of removing the cancer, he started to have kidney problems again.  Turns out his kidneys were damaged, so he had to go on heavy duty dialysis while they tried to find another donor.  You see, apparently the cancer process also changed his body enough that people who were once donors no longer match.  So he’s been doing the dialysis thing for quite a while, and then we got the news.

A doctor saw a spot on an MRI of his brain.  The doctor didn’t know if it was cancer or scar tissue, but thought it was cancer.  Another doctor thought it was scar tissue.  They traveled quite a distance to have a special scan done, and the doctors were split again as to whether it was cancer or not.  So they traveled to Texas to meet with some specialists to see about determining if it is cancer, and then pursuing aggressive treatment.

We just found out today…he has a clean bill of health (cancer wise)!  We are overjoyed.  If my wife wasn’t laid up from her surgery, we’d both be jumping up and down!

I wanted to give you a quick update on my wife’s ACL reconstruction surgery.  We went in to the hospital yesterday at 11am and got her checked in.  She was told she was to be taken into surgery at 12:30pm.  Apparently there was a traffic mess coming down to Salt Lake from Park City, where her surgeon has his office, so she didn’t get into surgery until 2:15pm.

Apparently when the surgeon cut her knee open he discovered chronically inflamed tissue that he was concerned was rheumatoid.  He removed the problematic tissue, but because rheumatic tissue releases excess digestive enzymes he did not think an ACL graft would be successful.  He was able to repair a partial tear to the meniscus, but her knee is still lacking an ACL.  He sent the tissue to the pathology lab, and we should find out late next week if it is rheumatoid.  That would not make us happy.  But we’re remaining positive.

So now, my wife is recovering from surgery.  Her leg is in an immobilizer and she can’t put any weight on it.  She has to do exercises every hour, and take Percocet every four hours to manage her pain.  She’s a trooper, but this is very discouraging.  She essentially has to go through the whole healing process, and then probably have another surgery down the road.  Yippee.

Thoughts and prayers are appreciated.

I work in a hospital environment.  On a daily basis I interact with, or observe, a large number of staff members, who all hold different positions in the hospital.  It amazes me how often I see these professionals engaging in unhealthy behaviors.  I see obesity, smoking, hear talk of substance use and watch people consume horrible foods.

Now, I know that working in a healthcare setting doesn’t make a person perfect, not by a long shot.  But it is astonishing to me how many of us dispense advice left and right, but don’t follow it ourselves.

How can I expect my patients to take my advice, if I won’t take it myself?!?  When I was in my second year of graduate school, I had been seeing patients for a few months, it occurred to me that I better practice what I preach.  Here I was talking with patients about the values of sleep, regular relaxation, healthy diet and exercise, and I was doing none of it.  At that point I made a conscious effort to follow my own advice.  I forced myself to sleep 7-8 hours, started eating healthier, got up in the morning and went to the gym, and started practicing my relaxation techniques to manage my stress levels.

Shouldn’t we expect this from all professionals?  If you really believe these things are important, why aren’t you living them yourself?

Importantly: If you are a patient, don’t write off advice just because someone doesn’t follow it themselves.  Challenge yourself to take steps towards health.  No matter how hypocritical someone is being when they tell you to eat better/exercise more/stop smoking/whatever, the advice is still good.  Yes, you can be upset with them, but don’t continue unhealthy patterns out of anger.  Who knows, maybe you can be an example to your healthcare provider!

This weekend seemed like a great one for a mountain trip.  A friend from Oregon who lives in Provo emailed to see if I wanted to go snowboarding.  I said, “absolutely!”  Since my wife was not working on Saturday, she joined us as well.

Everything was going fine for the first hour or two, but then we went to a new lift to hit some good blue runs.  We got off the lift, and my friend and I strapped into our bindings.  We all headed down a ridge to the top of a bowl, but my wife didn’t make it to the top.  We turned around and saw her sitting down about 100 yards behind us.  Sure enough, she fell and hurt her knee.

Next thing I know Ski Patrol is strapping her into a sled and taking her to the medical clinic.  X-ray showed no breaks, but the doc pulled different ways on her leg and diagnosed her with a torn ACL.  Yippee!

So now we’re checking out doctors who are covered by our insurance and preparing for ACL reconstruction surgery and the resultant rehab.  Thankfully we were referred to a top doctor in the field who works in Utah and is covered by our insurance.  Now we just hope we can get in to see him!

My wife is so cool that, despite her injury happening at 11:00 am, she insisted on hanging out at the lodge while my friend and I spent the rest of the day on the slopes.  It was fun, I got some more black diamonds done, but my mind was with her all day.

Well, I guess it’s really Back Like Avoiding A Heart Attack. I finally got back into the gym today. That’s right, I’m trying to focus more on this thing people call fitness. For some reason once I get out of the habit of working out I find every reason in the world to skip the gym one more time. I decide that my schedule just doesn’t allow it, that I really need to sleep an extra hour, that those stupid stare-in-the-mirror jocks will be taking up all the free weights, or that I really need to see what happens on Jerry Springer (ok, that one’s a bit untrue…do they even have Springer on TV anymore?).

According to my schedule, Tuesdays are cardio days, so I proceeded to the elliptical machine area. The problem is that proper spacing etiquette didn’t help me pick a machine. Just like in urinal etiquette, there is a certain way you are supposed to space yourselves out between the machines. Certainly everyone knows the inviolable rule–unless you have no other option, you pick a machine that lets you have a one machine buffer zone between you and the next person. If you want to have fun, sometime go into a gym (or bathroom) and walk over to a row of machines (or urinals) that is completely empty except for one, and pick one machine (urinal) immediately next to the solitary person. It is just not done. So I walk over to the elliptical machines and I have two options: between two ladies, or next to one lady on the end. Now, the secondary rule of positioning etiquette is that when the first rule must be violated (when you can’t institute the buffer) you only pick a space between people if there are no end spaces open. So, the secondary rule would tell you that I should pick the end spot next to only one lady, as opposed to the open space between two ladies. However, one more data point: the end spot is also immediately in front of a mirror. This messes with the rules, because anyone who uses an elliptical machine in front of a mirror obviously enjoys staring at him/herself and is therefore the most vain person in the world. This is to be avoided.

So what did I do? I picked the spot between the two ladies, but made sure to indicate to them that I did, indeed, know this was less than optimal, by staring straight ahead (out the window) looking down only to adjust my iPod. This is nonverbal submissive behavior and is like wearing a sign that says, “I know this is a minor violation, and I’m not any more happy about it than you.”

I still haven’t figured out how to properly drink from my Nalgene water bottle while “running” on the elliptical. You see, I don’t have any water bottles laying around, so I just take my Nalgene. But, unfortunately, the Nalgene has a mouth opening approximately the diameter of a firehose, which makes drinking while “running” sloppy. I do have an opening insert that makes a small sipping area, but it also has an opening at the top for air (much like when you poke two holes in a can to pour out the contents), which tends to act like a sprinkler as I “run” and drink. Luckily I usually sweat so much it’s hard to distinguish the sweat from the Nalgene sprinkles. Finally, an upside to turning beet red and sweating buckets when exercising. Yay.